Bonzai Monk (1975 - )

Mr. Monk's girlfriend and he had just gotten into a heated argument before entering their local Swifty Mart. Once inside, says Monk, things escalated. ''She grabbed up a super-sized Snickers candy bar. She opened it while walking toward the door, and just as she was about to take a bite she hollared rather loudly at me, 'Snicker's, unlike satisfies me!''' The bell they fixed to the door to warn of incoming customers let out a brash haunting ring as she walked out the door. ''But not before she turned to the cashier, pointed at me, and said, 'He's paying!'''