Violet Radish (1979 - )

Ms. Radish was discovered by a kindly farmer and his wife in Surrey, England, who when tending to their cabbage patch were surprised to discover a baby in between the leaves. At twelve years of age, she left the farm and joined the circus, where she sold popcorn, swung from a trapeze, and freelanced as a lion and bear tamer. When she was fourteen, a tall, mysterious man appeared at the circus and announced that he was Lord Stanley Rutabaga and that Ms. radish was his daughter and heir. She was then sent to finishing school in Switzerland to remove the smell of the circus. Unfortunately, it turned out that Lord Rutabaga's ancestors had been on the wrong side of the Napoleonic wars and shortly after Ms. Radish returned to London, ready to make her society debut, the Rutabaga family was stripped of its title and noble crest. Crushed, she packed her white debutante dress and set sail for the New World. There she found her prior experience had prepared her well for a life in advertising. She worked at numerous interactive agencies before leaving to start her own venture, Carrots, Leeks, and Potatoes, Inc.

Poems