Don't Bet Your Quatloos: 11 Haikus about the New Star Trek Movie
by Gordon Stanley
CLASSIC Trek: '60s ideals
New Trek:
Budweiser and Nokia ads
The future shines
Brightly lit plastic white
The future is Sephora
Red Matter
must've been used while writing the script
Note all the big holes
Say Spock stops the supernova
Romulus lives
-- but without its sun?
Spock maroons Kirk (on Hoth)
right where Old Spock and Scotty
happen to be.
Nero the zero
uses drill to plant a black hole.
Makes me miss Sybok
Scotty beams into a drain pipe
Would've been funny
. . . in Galaxy Quest
With J.J. Abrams
Will the sequel make more sense?
Don't bet your quatloos
Uhura hearts Spock
Vulcan booty call
But will she wait seven years?
With this reboot
All past Treks don't count
like that episode of Dallas
The Shatner is Kirk
Don't try to outKirk him
because you Khaaaaaaaaaaaaan't

