THAT thing on your cheech
is not cancer
it is not an STD
it is not your twin who never grew
is not some mysterious female problem
is not a homeland security camera-phone implant,
or an iPhone for the crotch

it may be annoying
it may feel funny
it may look really weird and is probably contagious
but nothing on your body is unappealing to me
not even the areas
you overexposed to the sun
that are red and scaly

bring it here
that thing on your cheech
bring it closer
that thing on your cheech
let me kiss it
and make it better