The Soul of Liberty Valance Returns to Get a Popcorn Refill

I SPILLED THE
popcorn under my
seat
So I went to get a refill
from a teenager
working the
concession stand
I told her I needed
more popcorn,
I told her how i spilled it,
but she got
all up in my face
She called me a
thief and who the hell
Did I think I was asking
for free popcorn and after
all she barely makes 8 dollars
an hour so I climbed
over the counter
and I grabbed her by the hair and
I bashed her head against the counter
until she begged for mercy
And I looked for the biggest popcorn
bucket they had and grabbed
handfuls of popcorn and filled
The bucket and I squirted a little
Bit of the stuff that
they call butter
on top
They were all looking at me like I had lost my mind
but I decided since I was there I might as well
get a hot dog
And a large soft drink
I could see she was bleeding
I felt bad for her but I wanted
To get a large Icee, and a large package of
M&M's, people were screaming
As I climbed back over the counter
holding all that crap with both hands,
I heard two shots ring
out in the lobby of the theater,
and I knew that I was done
for, but I know
that I'm the bravest
girl that ever got a popcorn
refill

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