Guy walks into an
antique shop and says,
''Hey, what's new?''

By Catty Marlboro

1 July 2009
THIS MONTH'S HACKS: With all the celeb deaths and the news in the news, our poets have been on overdrive. Writing between sets at the Sands, Mal Torme gives us a monologue on the Great McMahon, who he reportedly knew personally. Dandy Doc Moran turns in two efforts this issue, a ballad on Bernie and well as a behind-the-scenes look at Boston's Gay Pride parade. Doc, you will get us sued one day. Thank you. I even made an effort this issue, with a little ditty on a fallen angel. It's not so asinine, but I like it. New to the site, poet Michael J. Bayer uncovers the dirty world that did in David Carradine. (Our 1500th poem, by the way). You're sick, Bayer, FYI. Texan beauty Kat Wopat compares her life to the all-too-obvious advantages of state governorship. Clever Kat. Pop culture pundit Gordon Stanley can't resist rolling all the recent deaths into one eulogy. L.A. lion Stoney Emshwiller waxes his chest to play in the summer sun. Says Stoney about his own poem, ''Who writes this crap?'' Newbie to the site, the very funny Meg Johnson variably examines her ex. After a very long absence (time spent in the Congo, no doubt), the mysterious Mr. K returns with a sequel to an earlier asinine ode. And third newbie this month, Matt Dennie looks at death from a more self-inflicted angle.

CONTESTS, DAMMIT: You hard up for cash? Who's not?! Well, we've got two contests, count 'em, TWO. That means two announced TWO contest for this year. For CONTEST 13: ASININE PROSE, send in asinine fiction or nonfiction, 600 words max. For CONTEST 14: ASININE POETRY VIDEO, send in asinine video, narrating a poem or a video poem or however you want to take that. We'retalking big money here, more than we've ever had in a contest before. It's gotta be at least enough to pay for some groceries!

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