My Parasitic Twin

by R.P. King

I wish I had two heads
'cause which one would really be me?
If I said something strange or stupid
—causing people to stare—
I could say ''Don't look at me,
he's the one that said it!''

And if I ever had
deviant thoughts in my mind
of two chicks making out
then getting it in every
way from six guys,
then I could look to heaven,
proclaiming with a true heart,
''Don't condemn me to Hell,
he's the one that thought it!''

And if I ever went looking
for a hot date some Friday night,
the ladies would be looking, too, at the
deformed disfigurement by my side. But
I would have the gumption, and
I would have the nerve
to look them all in the eye—
drawing in my breath—
and say ''Hey, baby,
that ain't all we got two of.''

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