RUING the day I took you, job, shall never come
When I sat for the first time in my tiny veal pen
Instead of confined, I felt my future rip open
As a place of work you cannot be outdone!

Just because my boss wears Funk No. 9
And the marketing lady rewrites my copy
And the work I turn in is careless and sloppy
Does not make my work day any less sublime

While my cubicle neighbor is a loud complainer
And everyone around me schlumps around mad
And all the empty desks are sure kinda sad
But these 7-day work weeks just make me more saner

Who needs promotions and raises? The soft!
Just promise me, job, that you won't lay me off!