Sign of the Times

by Scott Emmons

THE ZODIAC is changing up
For reasons quite arcane.
Astrology enthusiasts
Are in the House of Pain!
A Libra's now a Virgo
Which may mystify and spook us,
And a poor December baby
Has become an Ophiuchus!

If you're an Ophiuchus,
You're good-humored yet erratic.
You're prone to frequent flatulence
And therefore aromatic.
As a kid you wouldn't eat a thing
But cereal and mucus.
Yes, you're proudly independent
If your sign is Ophiuchus!

You're happiest when racing slugs
Or reading your thesaurus.
You're not too fond of Capricorns.
(You think they're full of Taurus!)
Your perfect mate is Yoda,
So you're stalking Mr. Lucas.
It's a most bizarre existence
When you're born an Ophiuchus!

Previously published in The Daily Rhyme.

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