Young Boy Plum and Teacher Grunt

by John Powers

THERE once was a young boy named Plum
Who chewed up the fat and the gum
During class when he shouldn't
Teacher said look here, student
Spit it out or I'll soon whip your bum.
He said my fearest of teachers
You are one son of a preacher
I'll git rid of this wad,
And yes with a nod
Stuck it right under his bleacher
What hammers have you learned, dear one
Your home is a bottle of flun?
Do you stick under chairs
In milk and éclairs
All your toothy marked green gumm.
No sir, I never and dun't
If i was I certainly wun't
Do it again
Nor will my friend
Your son, Mr. Teacherly Grunt.
I've learned these hammers so bad
From him and he from his dad
You see that it's true
I've learnt them from you
You edition and lecherous cad.
The class is dismissed as of now
I'd like to see you anyhow,
young little boy Plum
and bring your green gum
meet up by the village store cow.
Plum met the ill hammered pop
They walked twenty spaces and stopped
Grunt had a whip
But Plum was equipped
With gum flavored cherry challop.
Grunt stepped up to face the boy Plum
''Stick out four fingers and thumb''
His mouth was wide open
So Plum fired his weapen
And choked teacher Grunt with his gum.

Moral: Don't take any wooden sticks of gum.

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