My Lazy Bones

by ern modern

MY dog is small, his hair a mangy coat,
His mouth a drooling mess, a smashed-in mug.
He reeks so bad I think I smell a goat.
Even too ugly to be called a Pug.
I try to name him Max and Rex and Spot
And even Fido. He just sits and stares,
And sways with the arc of his dripping snot.
I call him Lazy Bones, not that he cares.
He doesn't walk. I drag him through the streets.
He doesn't even lift his leg to pee.
Now I refuse to give him doggy treats Until he stops laying his shit on me.
     Some people say a dog's a chick magnet.
     My Lazy Bones ain't got me lucky yet.

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