A Quail's Best Friend, or The Great Hunting Mishap

by Daniel Thomas Moran

WITH the nation well on its way to Hell,
And Scooter poised to show and tell,
Snapshots of The Vice Prez, The Prez and Jack,
About to bite them on the back,
With Iran, DeLay and Kim Jung Il,
The V.P. was itching for a chance to kill.

So Cheney with a bird gun and an orange vest,
Headed way down to Texas where the lone quail's nest,
To show his friends whose were the biggest balls,
And who could make the bestest birdie calls.

Oh, for certain there was never the fairer fight,
Than a long gun against a quail in flight.
But while Big Dick was thinking shock and awe
Both his eyesight and his aim were poor.

Oh, Mighty Cheney would have much preferred,
To take down that harmless flushed out bird.
But instead of hunting down his prey with grace,
He peppered his buddy’s neck and face.
Though the results seemed something sadly fateful,
The Secret Service reported the quail were grateful.

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